Boundaries Are Punk Rock
In these short weekly notes, you’ll find three things: (1) something I’ve learned about being wild AND well, (2) words from brilliant minds who struggled with mental health too, and (3) one small experiment for you to try.
Let’s begin
The Well
“Say yes to everything.”
Inspirational advice, right? Be open, take risks, let the world surprise you. Lovely.
But I’ve gotten far more out of saying no.
And, looking back with honesty, many harrowing situations could have been avoided if I’d simply set a boundary and held the line.
I used to be awful at it—worried that people would be shocked, disappointed, or furious if I stopped being quite so obedient. But for the sake of my mental and sometimes physical health, I finally started saying no. And were people horrified?
Absolutely.
But it got easier with every boundary I set and stuck to.
What changed wasn’t their reaction, but my willingness to survive it.
Today, my feral protection of my own time, health, and safety feels infinitely better than compromising any of these things to satisfy someone else.
Saying no isn't rude—it’s punk rock.
The Wild
“Never compromise yourself. You are all you’ve got.” — Janis Joplin
"Literature is strewn with the wreckage of those who have minded beyond reason the opinion of others." — Virginia Woolf
“Disobedience, in the eyes of anyone who has read history, is man’s original virtue.” — Oscar Wilde
The Way
This week, set one boundary you’ve been afraid to set. When guilt shows up (and it will), remember: protecting your time and well-being isn't selfish—it creates space for the yeses you actually want.
And if you find it difficult to do this for yourself, do it for Oscar.
Do it for Virginia.
Do it for Janis.
